There are two times in my life that I rarely speak about in much detail; my military service and a relationship I feel is best described as a trauma bond. Each were about 4 years of troubling experiences.
I was in a cyclical relationship of desired and discarded, severed ties after attempt 7 or 8. There was a lot of pain and avoidance. I was not safe or comfortable, I was surviving his difficult days while enduring my own difficult days. We brought out the absolute worst in each other.
We can understand why someone is causing us harm and not tolerate their abuse of us. I am fortunate for Mister being the calm to my chaos and have been deep in healing habits since we met in 2020. Healing trauma is hard work and we all have our individual journey’s to navigate in our own time. Build all the boundaries and protect your well-being.
The more comfortable I feel in my own skin and the more confident I become about being authentically me, I find I have more grace for myself and by extension, more understanding for others. I recognize that we all struggle in our own ways and cope in the ways that bring about the desired results. When I feel overwhelmed, I prefer to be left alone until I can calm my senses down.
Where conflict always rises higher is with failures to communicate (listening and speaking up). The moment any human indulges vengeful or spiteful thoughts and actions that is developing into their character with each indulgence. Inversely, the more we practice kindness and compassion the more we can be kind and compassionate — to you first.
I can never express enough gratitude for the life I am living today. Writing from the comfort of a screened in patio, lounging and listening to birds chirp. Feeling comfortable and safe are far more enjoyable than feeling like I can never be worthy enough. We all have value because we exist and we all deserve to find the path to leave behind what harms our quality of life. You’re alive. You are worthy.
All questions, comments, concerns are welcome below ⬇️
Give love. 💛 Be well, sweet souls.
Salley's Mile ∞ 